Best Advice for Long Distance Relationships

Several schools of thought have it that long distance relationships are never ever going to work.

I won’t blame them for their reasons; probably theirs didn’t work out and therefore come to the conclusion that no other distance relationship can stand the test of time.

Unfortunately, we are discouraged from getting into such relationships by the very people we love and respect and they range from family members or friends close to our heart and tend to know us inside out. They will tell you weaknesses and your strength. They will also point out your personality trait and tell you why you cannot succeed in a long distance relationship.

Sometimes these close pals give us a go ahead but with a caution that you should not be too into the relationship in case of heartbreaks.

 There is no relationship on the surface of the earth that is all on a bed of roses. There must be trying times. Even those living under the same roof 24 hours a day and 365 days a year still have great challenges.

Every healthy relationship thrives mainly for personal or collective decision and determination to make it work.

Sometimes we might not see the sweetest and best part of our partner unless we go on a trip. What make us find ourselves in long distance relationships most often is our jobs.

Long distance relationships could be complicated; it could leave us with moments of sadness, loneliness and cold nights. Sometimes long distance relationships helps us appreciate the very little things we over look or feel over familiar with like feeling each other skin (touch), holding hands, taking a walk together, eating together and having face to face conversation.

Distance relationships are usually tough at the initial stage but with understanding, trust and respect you will end up enjoying it.

For your long distance relationship to be an enviable one, here are the advice

1- Communication

 This is paramount as a result of the distance created. Ensure to keep the communication lines open. Technology has made it possible to communicate via various medium. Too much of communication may lead to another problem, so apply wisdom.

A creative and regular communication is needed but not excessive one. Hello in the morning and a good night every single day is okay. You can as well communicate other times; it depends on your activities and your partner’s availability, you must respect this,

It is important you both talk about any little development in both sides.

Means of communicating includes texting, voice calls, Video calls; audio and video clips and so on.

2- Guiding Rules and regulations

 Aside communication, guiding rules and regulations are important for a healthy distance relationship, so set them because they will help manage each partner. These rules could include time of visit; how often will you visit your partner. Every weekend, twice a month or one’s a month. You must set these rules and keep to them

There are several rules you could come up with that suit your relationship. It could be time for calls so you don’t disrupt your partners’ activity.

3- Be-careful with Emotions

 There is always tension in distance relationship, especially sexual tension. Sex is an emotion need and as such you must be careful about it. I personally will advise no talking dirty in a long distance relationship as this could result to anxiety in the relationship.

4- Connect in the Mind

 If you came across interesting book or piece,  recommend it to your partner, probably a new TV series that talk about something related to your partner, with this you are connect in the mind and you see yourself talking about related issues or same issue. You could as well connect by watching the evening news together from your respective locations. That is mind connection and it has proven over and over again how effective it is. You could play online game of choice. I recommend playing chess online.

5-Have a Working Plan
 A long distance relationship with no working plan will soon get to a dead end. You must have a working plan and stick to it. You must agree on visiting times. Don’t just bumping in on your partner, it is so offensive and points to mistrust.

Also note you cannot continue in a long distance relationship forever hence a working plan in place to show clearly when and how you will put an end to the distance relationship.  Don’t forget that you also need a working plan to keep the relationship going and another plan for retirement from distance relationship.

6-Be Positive Always
 Positivity is another secret for a distance relationship. Keep your mind on the positive always. Don’t allow unhealthy thoughts creep in.

7- Be True to Yourself and Your Partner
 The one and only person you should be totally honest with should be your partner. Don’t hide your feelings from your partner; feeling of jealousy, insecurity, feeling of fear and depression.  Hiding things from your partner will lead to distrust and relationship anxiety.

Don’t keep any troubling issue to yourself. Inform your partner so they can help.

Read How to build trust in Relationship

8- No Stalking

 You should interact on social media, it is good in relationships.  But don’t stalk as it could point to mistrust in the relationship. When you stalk unnecessarily you will start seeing things that are not true. You start suspecting the waiter at the background of your partners’ picture.

9- Visit

 This is also crucial for the relationship. Visits should not be a one way thing. Let your partner also visit you.

Ensure to take them out when they visit and introduce them to your friends, business associates, and colleagues at work and so on. This will build up confidence and trust for you and forgiveness will be available anytime in case of any error or fault later in the relationship.

Go for a walk together when your partner visits holding hands. Go to the movies together, do things together to keep memories.

Read Trust in relationship-The Journey of Forgiveness in 8 tips

Picture: Pixabay

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