What are the five love languages? We'll help you decipher them to understand the different ways people express love and in so doing, you’ll be a better person.
The Five Love Languages written by Dr. Gary Chapman, was written
in 1995 and has become really popular with everyone trying to be a better
partner and also to improve themselves to be better understood by others.
The five love languages describe the way we feel loved and
appreciated.
Note that this is dependent on our individual personality types;
we may feel loved differently than how our partners do. This is true and so understanding
and decoding these different languages/ways of showing love will help take the
guesswork out of your partner’s expectations and needs.
By understanding your love language, you save your partner time to
discover how you feel loved and appreciated by you simply telling them. If your
partner loves adventure, allow them sometime to decode themselves.
According to Dr. Gary Chapman, there are five love languages:
Acts of Service
Words of Affirmation
Quality Time
Receiving Gifts
Physical Touch.
Note that some people have more than a love language. It’s your
duty to find out the one that speaks louder in your partner and that’s their
primary love language.
1. Acts of service.
It’s never a crime if your partner has this love language. “Actions
speak louder than words” is still a blunt truth.
This love language expresses itself by doing things that you know
your spouse would like. For instance: Cooking your partners’ favorite meal,
doing the laundry sometimes, doing the dishes, etc are all acts of service.
They all require some thought, time and of cause, efforts.
Acts of service should be done with positivity and with your
partner’s ultimate happiness in mind before it can be considered an expression
of love.
Your partner will love this more if you’re naturally handy.
2. Words of affirmation.
This love language seems to be the simplest and yet could be complicated
or difficult if you push too hard trying to find the best word(s) to express
your love.
Dear, verbal compliments don’t have to be complicated as thought;
the shortest and yet simplest praises can be the most effective.
Here are a few phrases to express love to your significant other.
“That dress looks incredible on you!”
“You smell good.”
“You always make me laugh.”
“Your smile is breathtaking.”
“I love your hair today.”
“Thanks honey, you’re the best.”
“It feels like morning anytime I’m with you.”
“Your smile melts my heart.”
“You shine brighter than the sun.”
“Thanks for your help.”
“I love you more than you could imagine.” Etc.
The right words and said at the right time means a lot if your
partner has this love language. The right compliments and “I love you” can go a
long way in your relationship. Note that negative or insulting comments will
hurt your partner.
3. Quality time.
This love language is all about undivided attention and it’s
better with the combination of #5 in a confi position. No smart phones or any
other form of distractions.
If this is your partner’s primary love language, they want to be
the center of your attention and not the Tv or your smart phone. They want
their partner to look at them and touch them.
So when you get back tonight, curl up on the couch with your
partner to watch a nice movie or Tv series.
Be sure to dedicate time with your partner without all of the
distractions. That will help them feel reassured in the relationship.
Note: Every time you cancel a date with your significant other or
postpone time together, it can be extremely hurtful to your partner as it can
make them feel like you care less about them and more about other things.
4. Receiving gifts.
This love language isn’t essentially materialistic. It just means
that a meaningful or thoughtful gift makes your partner feel loved and
appreciated. Most certainly, if you hurt someone like this, you have to gift them
to get their forgiveness and something as simple as picking up a pint of their
favorite ice cream or grilled chicken could do the job.
This is different #1 where you show affection by performing
actions to help your partner. In this case, you’re not doing anything special
for them rather than gifting them.
5. Physical touch.
To people with this love language, nothing is more impactful or
meaningful than the physical touch of their lovely significant other. Partners with
this love language feel more connected and safe in their relationship by
holding hands, kissing, cuddling, hugging, running hands on their body, etc.
If Physical Touch is your partner’s primary love language, they’ll
feel unloved without physical contact despite your effort at the other languages.
All the words and gifts in the entire world won’t change their
feelings except your touch them. They just want to feel you close by, not just
emotionally, but physically and I mean physically.
There are five love languages: Words of Affirmation, Acts of
Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch. Each one is
important and expresses love in its own way.
Learning your partner’s and your
own primary love language will help create a stronger bond in your
relationship.
The Different Love Languages And How To Express Your Love
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