Most ladies are misinformed on what it takes to be a great girlfriend/significant other. It’s not about cooking his favorite food or wearing sexy lingerie or walking topless in the house or mastering some crazy erotic moves. It doesn’t mean these things don’t help, but they don’t get to the heart of the matter.
Its’ way more than those listed above – not even your beauty
dear. Sorry I just hurt your feelings.
It is imperative to understand how men think and what
they need in a relationship. This makes an enormous difference in the way you
are able to relate to one another in a healthy way.
The number one requirement for having a great
relationship is to be your best self and this includes positive changes on your
attitude. How you care and express your love for your partner.
A trap that many people in relationships fall into is
blaming their partner when problems arise. Rather than seeing what they can do
to make things better, they blame him for not being what they want and think
that if only he did ABC, then everything would be just fine.
Sorry honey, it doesn’t work that way – maybe in the
movies though. You can’t make someone what you want them to be. All you can do
is bring your best by helping your partner rise to the challenge. One of such
ways is to talk and talk – COMMUNICATION with the hope that they’ll see reasons
to be a better person.
Here are eight
ways to be the most amazing girlfriend ever
1. Appreciate him.
90% of ladies don’t realize how starved men are for simple
appreciation. The problem with men is that they usually love others the way they
like to feel loved. While women typically feel loved when a man is being giving
and attentive to her and he’s able to meet her needs. In turn, many women will
be extra giving to their man, and while this is very nice and appreciated, it’s
not what men really long for deep within their soul.
What every man deeply and secretly desires is feeling
acknowledged, respected and appreciated for his role in your life. He wants to
feel like his efforts were a success. This applies to everything he does from
taking you out for a dinner to taking out the trash to making dinner to fixing
things in the house to helping with shopping, etc.
If your man takes you out on a date, acknowledge and
appreciate him for it and tell him you had an amazing time. Men are more
responsive to compliments about something they have done rather than who they
are – you’re handsome. I don’t mean you shouldn’t compliment your man for being
handsome. Ladies don’t usually realize this because they like general
compliments of you’re so pretty, nice, fun to be with, caring, etc. Telling a
man he’s thoughtful doesn’t have the same impact as saying something he did or
provided was thoughtful. For instance: “Thank you for doing the dishes, that
was so thoughtful of you – I love you honey.”
When a woman really sees and appreciates her man, he’ll
go any length to keep her happy.
Another important relationship skill is to try and see
the intention behind an action, and appreciate that as well.
No one is perfect and no matter how great your
relationship, there will be times when he isn’t doing something exactly the way
you’d like him to or expected him to. You’ll get a lot farther and do a huge
service to your relationship if you focus on what he is doing right rather than
focusing on what he isn’t doing right.
2. Make your boyfriend feel special.
Make your partner feel very special by not nagging at him at the slightest provocation. Remember every girl wishes to be treated by their boyfriend as the most special one in his world. Do you also know that most of them have forgotten how to treat their boyfriend the same way? Yet they go about nagging and wanting him to make them first in his life.
Here’s a little secret - if you want to be an exceptional
girlfriend, who desires to stand out from other girls, just make him feel
special rather than just waiting for him to make you feel special.
Love could be frustrating when it’s a one way thing. So
be thoughtful and show him that he’s your priority.
Communication is key. It’s one of the most important
components of a healthy relationship. Happy and healthy couples vocalize their
love for one another, saying “I love you” and expressing it one way or the
other often and offering regular compliments.
Communication also includes discussing the bad. In order
to move forward and grow strong, you need to be able to truly talk about your
feelings with your partner instead of sweeping issues under the carpet. No
matter how awkward or uncomfortable it feels, it will make for a long-lasting
and fulfilling relationship. Just look for the best way to communicate how you
feel to your significant other.
4. Be straight.
With reference to #3, most problems in relationships occur
because the woman expects the man to meet all her needs and when he doesn’t, he
is resented. She doesn’t ask for what she wants because he should just “know”
like a mind reader or Omniscience. She may drop hints to help him out and then
become even more annoyed when he doesn’t pick the hint.
The man, in turn, gets frustrated that nothing he does
seems to be good enough. Eventually he gets discouraged and stops trying and
she feels even more resentful leading to communication failure and eventually,
a failed relationship.
Most often, neither side has bad intentions for their
relationship, the real problem is that they aren’t communicating properly and
the reason is because men and women communicate differently.
Men do not pick up on nuances and subtleties in the same
way women do, men often need things spelled out in a clear and direct manner –
Honey, I feel this way because you did this or that; simple.
Dear, if you’re with your man don’t act passive/aggressive
until he asks what’s wrong? And you’ll sure say “nothing,” and when he takes
that to mean nothing is really the problem, you’ll continue to simmer because
he should ‘know’ there’s something!
For your own good, just tell him what he did wrong.
Note: In any relationship, it’s not usually what you say
but how you say it.
“If you tell a guy something he is doing that is
upsetting or hurting you in a loving, compassionate way, I guarantee he'll
try to fix it.”
“If you come from a place of anger or resentment, he’ll
shut down and will be less motivated to correct it.”
Most arguments in relationships come from deeper
underlying issues that never get discussed/resolved on time. Maybe the lady
feels her guy doesn’t care about her anymore or isn’t committed to her because
he isn’t as attentive or caring as he was in the beginning of the relationship
and instead of being straight about it and talk to him about how she feels, she
freaks out on him if he doesn’t return her call or reply her text. From there a
big fight may ensue over something trivial while the real issue goes untouched.
When you want something, or don’t want something, just
tell your significant other and sometimes, a little patience will help after
talking.
5. Give him space when he needs it - stress.
Handling stress and difficulties in both men and women is
really different. While women typically seek out their friends and want to talk
their heart out, men on the other hand would rather retreat into their shell or
proverbial man cave and deal with it on their own way.
A woman might get upset when this happens and think he’s
shutting her out, but it really has nothing to do with her, it’s just how he
deals with things.
If your boyfriend seems stressed and begins to withdraw,
just let him be, he’ll come back to you. Don’t coddle him or offer unsolicited
advice or get on his case about why he isn’t talking to you. If he wants to
talk to you about it, he will.
But if he doesn’t and you continue to push him, you will
be another annoying source of stress in his life that he definitely needs to
deal with and I’, sure he’ll withdraw even further leaving you in the dark.
Men know it isn’t easy for a woman to give them space
when they need it and if you can do it without feeling angry or resentful
towards your partner, you’ll be the woman who touches him more deeply than any
other out there.
6. Have a life outside the relationship.
This is not just for your partners’ sake; it’s also for
your own good.
Most ladies get into a relationship and the guy becomes
the sole center of their universe. This is in no way healthy.
This attitude kind of put your relationship in a holding
pattern and creates a setting where you can be dating for years after years
without taking the next step - Marriage. If a guy is getting all of you, all
the time, there’s no reason for him to take that extra step, but this is a
whole other discussion - wink.
Please note that your relationship can’t be your only
source of happiness and accomplishment; you need to have a balanced
life with several components filling you up in different areas.
If you throw all of that away for your guy, then you add
a lot of pressure to the relationship and will never feel completely satisfied
with what you’re getting from the relationship over time and this is because no
one can be your everything.
You may start to resent your partner and feel that he
owes you much more since you gave up so much for him, but that’s not fair
because the sacrifices you made were your choice.
Another reason you need to maintaining your own life
outside the relationship is you may end up staying in a bad relationship for a
very long time than you should have because you have nothing else to go back to.
Not even your career.
Men usually fall in love with their partner in their
absence and not their presence. If you’re always there he won’t experience that
deepening of the bond. To keep your relationship fresh and invigorating, it’s important
to have time apart to do your own thing.
It gives you a break from the emotional intoxication of
relationships so you can see things more objectively and it takes some pressure
off the relationship so it can unfold more organically.
I know it’s tempting to hang out with your partner every
time he asks. I know it’s really flattering when a guy wants so much of your
time. I also know you may think it’s because he is so crazy about you and maybe
you’re right. But giving in every time is not a good idea. If he’s a decent
guy, he’ll respect your boundaries and will encourage you to do your own thing occasionally.
7. Take care of your looks.
Don’t stop working out if it’s your thing, keep a healthy
diet, please shave your armpit/underarm, blow-drying your hair or any other
healthy or beautifying activities that were a part of your life before your
newly found relationship.
Yes, it’s easy to slide into a more hands-off approach
when you’re in a relaxed relationship. But if you do that, it won’t be long
before you’re searching up and down to retrieve the burning spark that once
existed between you and your partner. Wondering what on earth happened.
You really should make an effort to try to maintain your
appearance and look good for your guy. You put your best face forward during
those first few months of dating and there’s no reason for it to stop once
things are more established else he’s going to wonder what happened to your
looks.
“It feels really good to a man when a woman puts in
effort to look good for him. It will keep the passion and lust alive in your
relationship” – heard me!
The funny thing I notice about ladies in relationships is
that they’ll lounge around the house in sweats, messy bun and no makeup when
they’re home with their guy but will put on a face-full of makeup when going
out - to impress strangers?
Note that while his love isn’t only contingent on your
physical appearance, it’s really important and attractive to continue taking
care of yourself at the same level as when you first met.
8. Smile.
This is another tip that will enormously help your
relationship and also your life in general. Men cannot resist a lady with a nice
smile. In fact, every guy I know has said a positive attitude is the number one
most attractive quality a lady can have.
A nice smile covers a multitude of…
Look, life isn’t always going to be rainbows and
sunshine. But your life will be a much better place overall if you can tackle
it all with a smile and the conviction that it will all work out.
This kind of energy is infectious, it draws people toward
you, and it makes you the kind of woman he wants to be with forever. Don’t use
your guy as a sounding board or your relationship as an emotional dumping
ground. When your guy comes home, greet him with a smile…and then vent if you had
a rough day and need to let it out.
Try to see the good in all situations, both in your
relationship and outside of it. The things that happen in our lives, for the
most part, are neutral, what makes them good or bad is our perception and the
thoughts we attach to that event.
8 Ways To Be The Best Girlfriend Ever
Reviewed by Juilal
on
09:48
Rating:
Reviewed by Juilal
on
09:48
Rating:
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